Sheikh Sabrina Begum Urmi (19) got married to Kazi Musharaf Hussain (31) on 23 December 2005. This was a family arranged marriage. Urmi is an undergraduate student of Eden Girls College studying Political Science and has been in Dhaka City for four years, originating from Narsingdi. Kazi is a garment buying house businessman and was born in Dhaka City, but his family originated from Kaliganj.
Although traditional arranged marriages are still the predominant method of getting married in Bangladesh, the system has been evolving with more and more people falling in love before marrying. Whether it is an arranged or love marriage the bride and bridegroom’s families become heavily involved in making the arrangements. There are several parts to the whole marriage ceremony. Panchini (engagement) and Gaye Halud. The guardian of the bridegroom comes to the house of the bribe with an engagement ring, sari, sweet etc. At this occasion, the dates of the wedding are agreed and the amount of ‘Denmahor’ fixed. According to Islamic Law, the bridegroom has to give an agreed amount of money, cash or gold, to the bride when getting married.
‘Gaye Halud’ is a very enjoyable event undertaken separately by the families of the bride and bridegroom, and friends and family members are invited. The bride and bridegroom are given sweets and their faces, neck and hands are spread with turmeric paste. Biye (marriage) and Bou-bhat (wedding breakfast) take place chronologically and are the main ceremonies in a Bangladeshi wedding.
Marriage takes place in the house of the bride where a Kazi, who is both a religious and civil officer, performs the ceremony and gets the bride and bridegroom to sign a contract in front of witnesses from both parties. After that, the main marriage ceremony is organized by the bride’s family, when the bridegroom comes to pick up his new wife. Many people are invited, mostly family members and friends of the bride but also some from the bridegroom’s side.
Bou-bhat is organised by the bridegroom’s family about a week or so later after the marriage ceremony. It is usual for the bride and bridegroom to spend a few days in the house of the bride’s family after this ceremony, before setting permanent home at the bridegroom’s family home – traditionally – but some couples are now setting up independent homes after they get married.
